Thursday, July 19, 2007

Upholstery for fun and no profit

In preparation for the play that PJ is directing, I am attempting to secure set furniture and costumes. As things so often happen to me for some unknown serendipitous reason, the day PJ told me he needed two chairs, our neighbor down the street put two large wing chairs on his front lawn free for the taking. So I took them. The chairs themselves were in structurally great condition, just the fabric was faded and that on the arms was completely destroyed. I thought, how hard can it be to do a hack job of covering them? They only have to look good from a distance. It is to laugh. I asked Nancy the Upholstery Queen (no sarcasm here, she really is!), if she could just do a quick job on them and she said there is no such thing. So I did it myself. Here's what they looked like before:
I got some really elegant fabric from Nancy the Upholstery Queen ($4 a yard!!) and went to work with my staple gun and my hammer. It took me two afternoons to do both chairs. "There's good money in that upholstery stuff, you should go into that. Professionally". I hear my father's voice in my head; surprisingly enough, I didn't hear it in my ears this time. I'm very sure there is good money in it, and now I know there's a very good reason for that. Two afternoons and one very large blister (from the staple gun), many wasted staples, many safety pins and many naughty words later, I have two chairs that will not hold up to close inspection.
Nancy, my hat is off to you. But they look good from a distance, and if they survive the play I will be happy. Happy, nothing...I'll be astonished! No, I kid. They will be fine, you just can't look in the back or under the cushions!

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