The Purge and I

Day 4 of the big Purge. What an ugly word for a really great concept. The white garage, as we call it, where Crash put all of his stuff "temporarily" while he cleaned out the basement (x-number of years ago) is partially dismantled, its twisted metal skeleton exposed and almost ready to be taken down, the contents about 60% removed to meet their fate in the dumpster...or the yard sale, whichever applies.

When the dumpster dude showed up on Monday and did his best to put the thing where I wanted it, he said "is that ok?" and I said, "It's fine. It's beautiful". Shaking his head a little, he said "Well, I don't know how beautiful it is..." and I said "trust me, it's the most beautiful thing I've seen in a long time. I don't want to go to work today, I want to stay home and throw stuff away". "You'll get tired of THAT in about 10 minutes". To which I just smiled and said "Nope...I doubt it". Now on Day 4, I still don't want to go to work. But of course, I have to. So I've been working on the dumpster project after work every day, and I'm making great progress. I think. But although the pile in the dumpster is growing visibly (and thank GOD I got the big one), the mess in the back yard, inexplicably, seems also to be growing. Progress, apparently, is messy. I lamented to Preston last night that I have no place to put the good stuff temporarily to get it out of my way while I get rid of the no-good stuff. He said, "you know what you need? You need a white garage!" Wise guy.

Sparky apologized to me today, which made me laugh a little. It's not YOUR fault, I said. I don't hold it against him. And I don't. It's one of the things that made Crash who he was, this incessant accumulation. Everywhere I open a drawer or tote or box, there are projects he planned to do. Sketches of things he was trying to figure out a way to make work against all odds. Things he'd get around to fixing someday. And the reason, I think, that he never got around to finishing all these projects is that he had more fun PLANNING to finish the projects.

So far I am taking two things away from this project. The first is an overwhelming compulsion to clean my house. Which is why it's 2am and I've just sat down. The second is the notion that I should stop accumulating projects to finish and finish the ones I have started already. Because I have inherited that from him, that tendency to never finish what I start. I was just telling Sue the other day, the most fun part of a new project for me is the planning, the gathering together of materials, the design phase. And let me tell you, I have gathered together a pretty impressive collection of materials. I think it's time to put them to good use.